Have you ever asked yourself this question “Who Am I?”
Try it right now! Ask yourself “Who Am I?”
What answer did you hear? Did you hear your name? “I’m Mary Smith.” Did you hear your job title? “I am the Director of Contracts for ABC Hospital.” Did you hear a relationship identity? “I’m Mary’s mom.” Or “I’m Joe’s wife.”
Any of these types of answers would be common. And what these answers show us is that we tend to define ourselves by what we do. Even when we answer with our name, we haven’t really answered the question “Who am I?” Our names give us an umbrella under which all our “doing” falls, but it doesn’t really answer the question “Who am I?”
Notice that the dictionary defines the word “am” as “am is a verb that is used with the word “I” as the first person singular version of the verb “be.” So we could ask the same question a bit differently: “who am I being?”
So try that question on: who are you being? What answer did you get that time?
If you take the time to really look honestly at this question you will begin to push into the question of your core values. What we discover when we really look is that at any moment, you are representing various qualities. Right now, I am being thoughtful, contemplative, inquiring. And that will change when I am finished with what I am writing to you here. I may be “being hungry” in which case, I will go and make myself some lunch.
But notice how the present moment is the border around my “being,” and your “being” too. Notice how some states, like hunger or thirst or fatigue, are fleeting. Once I eat, or drink, or rest, these states pass away. Other qualities are more consistently embodied. These consistently embodied qualities are the way we can become in touch with our “being.”
Sometimes it is easier to grasp this point by thinking about someone other than yourself. Pick someone you have a deep affection for. And rather than focusing on their name, or what they do, or their relationship with you (my mom, my husband, my child, my friend, etc.) ask yourself “Who is ___?” Notice that qualities come to mind: she is kind, she is compassionate, she is caring. And you can see that while there are some qualities that come and go, there is a core “being” to this person: qualities that are consistently embodied by this person.
These qualities are their core values, and you have core values too. So, now ask yourself “what are my core values?” What are the qualities that express who I essentially am? Maybe it is not so easy to see this about yourself, so why make the effort?
We will explore this more tomorrow in Part Two. For Awakening Women, the question “who am I” is very important. Because as we awaken, our identities begin to change. Our definition of self moves from the external and temporal to the internal and the eternal.
When you discover that who you are is an expression of conscious awareness expressing aspects of itself through you as an embodied presence in this world everything shifts.
All my clients struggle with this. Many of my clients are successful business women. They have achieved goal after goal, realized dream after dream, and yet they experience a sense of emptiness and a lack of fulfillment that sends them to me. Together we explore this question “Who Am I?”
And it is beautiful to watch them as they begin to experience this identity shift. One client described it this way:
“So many limiting beliefs I have had about myself have dropped away. I used to live in such a small cage. Who knew that I had created that cage myself? With Kristin’s help I opened the door and set myself free.”
Tomorrow we will explore this powerful question “Who Am I?” more.
If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.