Do You Love Dancing With the Stars?

I do.

I love that show. I hardly watch any network shows, but I do watch that one! Why?

We can match our rhythms to life's rhythms and achieve a sense of flow and equilibrium...
We can match our rhythms to life’s rhythms and achieve a sense of flow and equilibrium…

First, I love the dancing. Frankly, there are times I wish some of the women wore a little more clothing, and looked a little less like strip club entertainers, but whatever…it is the movement of the dance that I really love.

I danced a lot as a young women, and I still enjoy dancing with my beloved when the mood strikes us. But even watching dance is fun and enjoyable for me.

Beyond that, there is the journey of each contestant, which is equally fascinating to me. It never fails to surprise me that these people do not seem to have confronted exactly how difficult and stressful this experience is going to be. Even the ones who have watched the show themselves and been fans seem to have severely misjudged the challenge that the show presents.

In that sense, the show mirrors life. None of us are prepared for the monumental challenges that seem to inevitably come our way. And no seems exempt: from the homeless man who seems to have no responsibilities, to the billionaire tycoon who commands vast resources, but whose vast responsibilities present endless challenges. Life calls for growth and evolution within each of us.

Can you learn to enjoy the ecstatic dance of life as it presents itself in this moment?
Can you learn to enjoy the ecstatic dance of life as it presents itself in this moment?

In my experience the happiest contestants on Dancing With the Stars are people who love to dance. And this is a lesson for us, I think. Can we learn to enjoy the process of life, and embrace its challenges? Can we give up the notion that problems and challenges mean something is wrong, and embrace them as part of the experience?

When we stop fighting life, say “yes” to what comes our way, openly embrace experiences, release the need to judge events as “good” or “bad,” we cultivate our own dance. We can match our rhythms to life’s rhythms and achieve a sense of flow and equilibrium that allow for the greatest enjoyment.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

The True Source of Wealth

What is the source of true wealth?

We are swimming in a sea of abundant possibilities
We are swimming in a sea of abundant possibilities

True wealth comes from one’s connection with the eternal creative force of life itself. And the great news is that we cannot be disconnected from this wealth. It is the fabric of who we are. Like fish swimming in a vast ocean, all humanity is “swimming” in a sea of wealth and abundant possibilities.

Why then do so many of us struggle with lack? It is because, like the fish doesn’t recognize the water in which he swims, we don’t recognize the wealth of possibilities all around us. Our identities as children are spacious and to a child anything is possible, at least until mom says “no.”

Children live in abundant possibilities until we teach them not to...
Children live in abundant possibilities until we teach them not to…

If you dress healthy children from all income brackets in a common uniform and put them together in a park, you won’t be able to tell who is from a home with money and who is living in poverty. All children are wealthy in terms of vitality, abundant imagination and capacity for joy.

It is our socialization that teaches us to experience lack. And once we begin to live in the “lack” paradigm, it can be a real challenge to find your way back into the open, trusting, possibility mindset you had as a child. But you can do it with determination and a willingness to allow the true experience of wealth to become part of your reality.

As the transformative light waves of energy shift our planet, all the old rules, beliefs, and ways of being are shifting as well. The chaos we are collectively experiencing is the result of the light of truth shining upon structures that are built on low frequency perceptions of lack. Every day there is news of abundant possibilities resolving our challenges. And often these solutions come from young people who are perceiving the world and its abundant resources in new ways.

Disruption is unsettling until we focus on new possibilities...
Disruption is unsettling until we focus on new possibilities…

While the chaos we are enduring is at best unsettling, and at worst, downright terrifying, the recognition that this disruption is the expression of new beginnings can be comforting. Life is organizing itself around our success, and when we trust this, participate with it, and say “yes” even when it is difficult, or challenging, we find ourselves being shepherded toward a life of ease and flow. The question is can you allow this truth to be your experience? Or will you interpret new beginnings in the context of old stories?

The essential unity of life makes the win/win condition a must going forward. It is only when we perceive the good of all to be our own individual good that we can thrive together on this over-crowded planet. As I deepen into a realization of what this truly means my sense of joy and elation expands exponentially.

Fortunately we human expressions are not in control of life, though many of us still labor under the illusion that control is desirable. But when a clear understanding of the plan for life on earth is achieved, control is clearly impossible, and it is not necessary. All of us control freaks who have been so busy trying to make life turn out for everyone else, often at our own expense, can finally breathe a sign of relief and turn over the reins to Life itself.

Krystopher and I enjoying life, knowing our needs are met...
Krystopher and I enjoying life, knowing our needs are met…

If you know you your needs are being met and your dreams are moving toward fulfillment as you simply take inspired action one next step at a time, why would you want to control life? Won’t you be busy enjoying yourself? And this viewpoint has the added benefit of knowing the same is true for all those you love as well, so there is no need to try to manipulate or control to benefit those you love.

This vision of Heaven on Earth is common to awakening women. We see how it can be. And it is up to us to embody this vision to our greatest capacity, and to grow that capacity each and every day. In this way we model right energy with every step we take.

We have to allow that open, trusting sense of connection to life to reestablish itself in our waking consciousness. We have to be aware of when the old habits and beliefs of lack are dominating our present moment, and consciously choose a more empowered belief in the next moment.

Here is a list of empowering beliefs that you might want to consider for yourself. Opening to allowing these beliefs to resonate with your authentic self provides a basis for opening to see new possibilities for yourself going forward.

These beliefs express the wisdom that you live in a fabric of abundant possibilities just waiting for you to awaken to them, and to take inspired action toward them. Instead of seeking wealth, come from wealth. This is the truth of your being. This is why it is so critically important for Awakening Women to connect to their soul essence. This connection is the source of all joy and fulfillment for us while we are experiencing being human in the material world.

True Wealth
True Wealth

I am willing to experience greater wealth on every level.

I am willing to awaken to my essence and let all the false identities dissolve.

I am finding the courage to change enough to allow more and more of my desires to manifest.

I allow myself to receive the riches of my true self.

I allow more of life’s riches into my experience.

I am open to be shown more ways to connect to my abundance.

As my perspective changes I recognize the wealth that is currently unseen.

I now allow myself to experience my inner wealth.

Just for fun I made short video with some empowering beliefs and images that will allow you to resonate with this true wealth model. Enjoy!

Please comment and let me know what you think!

Click here to see the youtube video open on a different page.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

What You Don’t Know About Allowing….

A client I’ll call Paula came to me because she said she had heard about “this allowing thing” but she didn’t have a clue how to do it. She wanted to “learn the tricks” about allowing, because there were some things she wanted in her life that weren’t there now. She had heard that allowing was the way to get them.

Allowing is a very tricky business. It is amusing in a way, because it is actually a natural state. Allowing requires no effort at all. But most of us have learned unnatural ways of being. Getting back into a state of allowing after we have spent all our time and energy “trying to make things happen” is a real challenge.

Paula is in sales…a real “go-getter”. She is very sparkly, very extroverted, very bright. Paula is used to going after what she wants, and getting it. She is very successful, the number one sales person in her company. But there were some things that she hadn’t been able to “get.” She wanted a love relationship. While she dated often, that special someone had not come along. Somehow the men she wanted didn’t seem to want her. The men who wanted her did not interest her.

And there were certain prospects, big accounts, that she really wanted to get, and had not been able to. She had tried everything, everything in her bag of tricks. But in these two areas no amount of doing was getting the job done.

We pretend that we can control everything...
We pretend that we can control everything…

We have become so focused on doing. What to do, how to do it…these are questions we have come to focus on because we can control this. If we don’t know how to do something we can learn. If that thing is a skill, we can practice. We can get a coach or a teacher or a mentor to help us.

We can set goals around it, strategize about it, think about it, talk about it…endless activity around it. We understand this. To some extent it is comfortable, or at least familiar, to do and do and do, to “make it happen.” Our drive to control life is often unconscious. We can fall into living a kind of robotic life, which is very stressful. Addictive patterns are likely to form in reaction, as a way of losing control. You feel deeply dissatisfied and empty.

In terms of her lack of a lasting love relationship, Paula did feel empty. She came to me right after her fortieth birthday. She felt she had to make some big changes, but she just didn’t know what they were. She heard about this “allowing thing” and decided to give it a try. She thought is was just one more thing, one more trick, for her toolbox.

But allowing is something else altogether. We can’t control it. We can’t make it happen. Although it can be modeled for us, no one can really teach us to do it. It isn’t something “to do.” Allowing is a way to be.

Saying yes to life...
Saying yes to life…

Allowing is a saying “yes” to the unfolding of life with total trust, total openness, total acceptance. It is an experience in the present moment, each present moment. It is the equivalent of opening the door to your heart to whatever is going on. You open your heart with the inner knowing that this moment is leading you where you most desire to be. Obstacles and challenges and disappointments don’t necessarily look like beneficial occurrences. But they can be, when held in an attitude of trust and acceptance.

We have desires, and many of us shut them down immediately. For years Paula had focused on her career and put her personal life last. She dated, but the men in her life were always considered after her work was done. They were always in second place in her heart. Paula believed she couldn’t have both. She put her dreams of a love relationship out of her heart. So many of us do this. We already believe we can’t have our deep desires, so we don’t want to feel them.

As Paula’s fortieth birthday neared she realized that she had to make some changes. She let go of this false belief that “I can’t have what I want.” She asked herself “How can I allow my desire to manifest?” That is a very powerful question. A friend referred her to me.

Again, it is a little tricky, because allowing is not something to do. It is a way to be. So use your imagination now and imagine this desire manifesting. What do you feel in your body? When I asked Paula this question she burst into tears. “I feel so sad,” she cried. “I feel so much regret for wasted time, even though I have enjoyed my work so much. It’s just that each night, when I go to bed alone, I feel so empty. My clients, my accomplishments at work, all the awards I have won, they don’t seem to mean that much to me anymore, even though it was enough for years and years.”

When you open to experience your deepest desires do you feel warm, and soft and open, eager even? Do you feel excited, enthusiastic, welcoming? If so, you are on the right track! These feelings are indicators that you are allowing these desires.

Do you feel robotic? Tense? Shut down?
Do you feel robotic? Tense? Shut down?

But maybe you feel tense, tight, sad or angry, shut down. Maybe your stomach churns, or your chest feels tight and it is hard to breathe. Maybe, like Paula, you feel grief or regret. These are signs you are not allowing.

When you feel something, this is great feedback. It lets you know where you are. When you feel unpleasant emotions you are feeling resistance. Some part of you is definitely saying “NO.” Confusing, isn’t it?

One would think if you desire something, that all of you would desire it, and would welcome imagining having it. But in this situation imagining having your desire creates unpleasant feelings, the inner answer is “no,” or at least, “not yet.”

What to do?

The most empowered response to these kinds of shut-down body sensations is curiosity. “I wonder what’s going on with me?” And then a gentle, compassionate conversation between you and the sensations you are having physically.

If you have never done it, it might sound weird. Paula laughed when I made this suggestion to her. “No way!” she said. After discussing it a bit Paula decided to give it a try. She asked her sadness “what are you trying to tell me?” Sadness replied “I feel so empty, so alone.” Regret replied “It is too late. There will never be a special someone for me.”

As the inner dialogue deepened false beliefs emerged. “I am not lovable. I am too old. Men only want younger women. I’m too loud. I’m too set in my ways.” And then the conversation moved deeper. “I’m afraid of being close. I’m afraid to share who I really am.”

Be curious about what your body reveals about your inner world.
Be curious about what your body reveals about your inner world.

Like Paula, if you find the courage to try it, you will find that your body has all sorts of communications and information for you. As you gain its trust, it will reveal the energies that have been hidden from your conscious awareness.

Now you are allowing the resistance. And that is a huge step forward. Most of us try to dominate or manipulate or force ourselves forward toward a desire.

This is the opposite of allowing. You may get your desire this way, but it is not likely. And if you do get it, you may be surprised to discover it wasn’t what you thought it would be at all. That ugly question arises “Is this all there is? I thought it would be more….”

As Paula and I explored these beliefs and fears we were able to reconcile the desire for intimacy and the desire to be free. Paula was able to let go of old habitual responses to her desire for intimacy and find the courage to be vulnerable. She became a softer, more inviting version of herself. Although it took practice, and working to see new options and possibilities, Paula evolved into a fuller expression of herself as a woman. And men definitely noticed.

About 7 months after Paula and I began to work together she met David at the opening of a friend’s photography exhibit. David, too, is in sales. And they both enjoy golf, and boating, and water skiing. They have been dating steadily for two months, and they seem to be growing together more each week.

So just for today, try to allow whatever is present in your present moment to be there. Be curious about what shows up. Get to know it. As you do, you will become more and more in touch with your authentic self, and saying “yes” to who you are will become easier.

The 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
The 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

This is the way to flow through life. When you begin to say “yes” to life, to allow life to be exactly as it is, you open the door to  the ability to co-create your life. That is why I want to invite you to download my checklist “The 5 Keys to Conscious Co-creation.” This checklist enables you to assess your co-creation skills.

Key #1 is the ultimate stress reducer: eliminate exhaustion and overwhelm. Paula found that allowing life to unfold was a much more relaxing way to live.

Key #2 makes change smooth and effortless. As Paula allows her resistance to speak to her, areas where false beliefs stop her are easier to identify and transform.

Key #3 causes anxiety to dissolve in mere seconds, allowing you to rest in the peace that passes all understanding. Paula is learning to keep her focus on how her body feels, and this gives her the ability to assess what her emotions are and what she needs.

Key #4 reconnects you to your passion for living. Paula is opening up a softer and more receptive side of herself that is transforming the way she relates to both men and women. This has made her more approachable in both business and personal settings.

Key #5 opens the door to the experience of beauty, and why you are desperate for it. Paula feels much more in the flow of experience as opposed to trying to swim upstream. Within this flow she has much more awareness of her environment, and the beauty that is expressing through each moment.

Click Here to Receive Your Free Checklist

 

Who Am I? Part 2

Your identity either cages you or sets you free....
Your identity either cages you or sets you free….

For Awakening Women, the question “who am I” is very important. Because as we awaken, our identities begin to change. Our definition of self moves from the external and temporal to the internal and the eternal.

When we begin to live consciously in the internal world of eternal being we live in deep connection with the qualities of awareness that have been combined to create the unique expression of LOVE that we truly are. Translated into the material world these are your core values.

Your core values, conscious or not, are driving the way you organize the experience of your life. When your life is being organized by unconscious core values, it is much more difficult to experience joy and fulfillment. In fact, if you are in a time of disorientation and confusion in your life right now, I suggest that part of the reason why is that you are disconnected from your core values.

Why Am I Here?
Why Am I Here?

Many people are wondering these days about the purpose of their lives. You may be asking “why am I here?” And often, people think that what will provide meaning, structure and fulfillment to their lives is to know what they are supposed to do. But if you think this, you are mistaken. What provides meaning, structure and fulfillment to life is to have access to your being: who you essentially are in your core, your core values.

Once you have identified your core values all life experiences provide information about whether the “doing” you are “doing” in the moment is leading toward greater expression of your core values, or away from expression of your core values. Let me give you an example.

When Susan, name changed to protect her confidentiality, came to me for help she said she was feeling depressed and lethargic. So I asked her “Who are you?”

She told me she was a wife and a mother and a librarian. So we talked about the difference between “doing” and “being” and I asked her the question again. This time she answered slowly, taking her time to allow herself to experience her “being.” She said “I am loving, creative, and supportive.”

Then we began to look at Susan’s life experience, and see where “loving, creative, and supportive” was showing up, and where it was not showing up, and who she was being when the feelings of depression and fatigue were showing up. This was a very interesting exploration that took place over several weeks.

Powerful insights change the way you perceive yourself and your world.
Powerful insights change the way you perceive yourself and your world.

Susan had many insightful revelations during this exploration. One thing she discovered is that she had made some choices to allow herself to develop a routine in her daily life which was squelching her creativity. She was doing the same things the same way day after day. While there were many opportunities for creative self-expression in her life, Susan had closed off her perception of these options by living in a rut. She had unconsciously drifted into these choices.

For example, Susan prepared breakfast for her husband and two children every morning. But for various reasons breakfast had become cereal and toast, day after day. She had stopped “creating” breakfast. She had stopped thinking about breakfast.

There were some good reasons for developing this routine. The family was busy, they had to get out the door to get the kids to school and get to work. So it was not an option to make a fancy breakfast every morning.

A drop of LOVE at breakfast changed everything.
A drop of LOVE at breakfast changed everything.

But was there room to allow herself to be creative and have some fun with the breakfast experience? It turned out there was! When Susan allowed herself to “be creative” and make breakfast fun, new possibilities and choices opened up. And guess what? Her family loved it! Breakfast became a fun family time at Susan’s house. It started everyone’s day better, and with a sense of love, laughter, and enjoyment.

And Susan realized that this could be a shared effort in the family. So after a family meeting, each family member began to contribute ideas and take responsibility for making breakfast fun every day.

It became easier to get the kids up. They were looking forward to breakfast. This creative energy set the tone for each family member to leave the house “full” of LOVE, and that LOVE flowed out into the day, and into the people each person was called to interact with throughout the day. The powerful ripple effect of beginning the day with a conscious expression of LOVE changed everything.

You might be saying “that is such a little thing.” And in terms of “doing” it was. But in terms of “being” it was huge. Susan’s being was craving creative expression. And there was nothing stopping her from it, except she had not identified her deep desire to express herself creatively. She did not have attention or focus on it, and it had drifted out of her life.

Ruts are arid and soul-killing
Ruts are arid and soul-killing

Creativity had been replaced by a rut that was “soul-killing.” The depression and fatigue that Susan was experiencing was being created by hundreds of small choices every day that were ignoring her core values, and not leaving room for her “authentic” self to show up. She had allowed herself to “be” more of a robot than a loving, creative, supportive wife, mother and librarian.

So if you are experiencing a lack of fulfillment in your life, a feeling that something is missing, or a chronic sense of frustration, try identifying your core values. Then look to see how you can express these values more fully in your life.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

Who Am I? Part One

Have you ever asked yourself this question “Who Am I?”

Try it right now! Ask yourself “Who Am I?”

What answer did you hear? Did you hear your name? “I’m Mary Smith.” Did you hear your job title? “I am the Director of Contracts for ABC Hospital.” Did you hear a relationship identity? “I’m Mary’s mom.” Or “I’m Joe’s wife.”

Who are You?
Who are You?

Any of these types of answers would be common. And what these answers show us is that we tend to define ourselves by what we do. Even when we answer with our name, we haven’t really answered the question “Who am I?” Our names give us an umbrella under which all our “doing” falls, but it doesn’t really answer the question “Who am I?”

Notice that the dictionary defines the word “am” as “am is a verb that is used with the word “I” as the first person singular version of the verb “be.” So we could ask the same  question a bit differently:  “who am I being?”

So try that question on: who are you being? What answer did you get that time?

conflcted 3If you take the time to really look honestly at this question you will begin to push into the question of your core values. What we discover when we really look is that at any moment, you are representing various qualities. Right now, I am being thoughtful, contemplative, inquiring. And that will change when I am finished with what I am writing to you here. I may be “being hungry” in which case, I will go and make myself some lunch.

But notice how the present moment is the border around my “being,” and your “being” too. Notice how some states, like hunger or thirst or fatigue, are fleeting. Once I eat, or drink, or rest, these states pass away. Other qualities are more consistently embodied. These consistently embodied qualities are the way we can become in touch with our “being.”

Sometimes it is easier to grasp this point by thinking about someone other than yourself. Pick someone you have a deep affection for. And rather than focusing on their name, or what they do, or their relationship with you (my mom, my husband, my child, my friend, etc.) ask yourself “Who is ___?” Notice that qualities come to mind: she is kind, she is compassionate, she is caring. And you can see that while there are some qualities that come and go, there is a core “being” to this person: qualities that are consistently embodied by this person.

Connect to the light at the center of your being
Connect to the light at the center of your being

These qualities are their core values, and you have core values too. So, now ask yourself “what are my core values?” What are the qualities that express who I essentially am? Maybe it is not so easy to see this about yourself, so why make the effort?

We will explore this more tomorrow in Part Two. For Awakening Women, the question “who am I” is very important. Because as we awaken, our identities begin to change. Our definition of self moves from the external and temporal to the internal and the eternal.

When you discover that who you are is an expression of conscious awareness expressing aspects of itself through you as an embodied presence in this world everything shifts.

All my clients struggle with this. Many of my clients are successful business women. They have achieved goal after goal, realized dream after dream, and yet they experience a sense of emptiness and a lack of fulfillment that sends them to me. Together we explore this question “Who Am I?”

And it is beautiful to watch them as they begin to experience this identity shift. One client described it this way:

“So many limiting beliefs I have had about myself have dropped away. I used to live in such a small cage. Who knew that I had created that cage myself? With Kristin’s help I opened the door and set myself free.”

Tomorrow we will explore this powerful question “Who Am I?” more.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

 

Do You Know How to Live in the Arms of LOVE?

And in the arms of LOVE

Heaven’s just a heart beat away

I’ll be your light in the dark

Your shield from the storm

Your shelter from the rain

And in the arms of love

I’ll lift you above

all the madness, all of the pain

And you’ll be safe and warm,

here in the arms of love.

I’ll keep you far from harm

Here in the arms of love.

–song performed by Micheal Bolton on his album Love Songs

Dear Ones:

LOVE heals.

LOVE is the eternal creative power of life
LOVE is the eternal creative power of life

Just a quick reminder, in the Awakening Women’s Community, when we use the word LOVE we are not speaking of Hallmark sentimentality, or codependent attachment (“you complete me”). We are speaking of the underlying creative power of life and its expression not only here, in this present moment, but in every present moment expanding into all time and space.

And the truth of your being is that you live in the arms of LOVE. It cannot be any other way. You were born from LOVE’s intention that you be here, being you.

This LOVE beats your heart.

This LOVE breathes your breath.

Have you noticed? Is “make my heart beat” on your to-do list today? How about “breathe every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every year”?

No? Of course not. LOVE is on the job 24/7 so you don’t have to be.

That is safety and security you long for! It has been right here with you all along.

All that we discuss here in the Awakening Women’s Community in terms of tips, techniques, ways of orienting to life and to your essence are there to assist you to get out of your own way, and let the maximum amount of LOVE into your life and into your heart.

The more you allow LOVE in, the more your spirit will soar, your mind will be free, your emotions (the whole spectrum, not just the “good” ones) will flow, and your physical body will reflect health and vitality.

When all your bodies are in alignment you easily connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world...
When all your bodies are in alignment you easily connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world…

When all your bodies (physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual) are aligned and receptive to LOVE, LOVE will flow into your life from your Creator, and through your heart, out into the world around you. You are the channel for LOVE’s presence in the world. You are the LOVE ambassador. It is a vitally important job, Beloved!

As you live in the presence of your own unique LOVE song, you will discover the possibilities and choices that allow that LOVE to manifest.

As you see this happening more and more every day your sense of fulfillment will expand exponentially. Your sense of “hunger” will diminish. Your sense of “neediness” will diminish. Your thoughts of “lack” will diminish. You will feel full, and satisfied.

You will learn to use “negative” emotions to achieve “positive” purposes. Upsets and challenges will become useful guides to further expressing your LOVE. How cool is that? There is no need to avoid “bad” feelings because they are such powerful guides and they assist you to remember who you truly are, and shift into empowered perspectives on life’s circumstances. Every challenge becomes a way to allow more LOVE to consciously flow through you.

LOVE allows you to be optimistic about the direction your life is taking
LOVE allows you to be optimistic about the direction your life is taking

Your beliefs and attitudes will slowly and gently begin to reflect LOVE’s vision for the world. Your confidence in the power of LOVE will allow you to be optimistic about the direction your life is taking. And when you allow yourself to live in a community of like-minded women, the collective power of this LOVE will move mountains. The vision of Heaven on Earth will move closer and closer into full expression.

When you live in the presence of LOVE you will feel the arms of LOVE around you more and more of the time. People will be drawn to your LOVING energy on a daily basis. Your sense of loneliness and isolation will disappear and you will know the joy of being intimately connected both to your Creator and to your world.

In this way you live as LOVE’s ambassador, playing the part you came here to play as LOVE’s ambassador, supporting the manifestation of Heaven on Earth.

LOVE provides a sense of connection to all within the ALL
LOVE provides a sense of connection to all within the ALL

Does that mean you will never feel pain, never experience loss, never suffer again? No. This experiences are part of life. Part of the cycle of birth and death, and those experiences will continue to play a role. But when you live in the arms of LOVE you do not have these experiences alone. And when LOVE becomes your reality the eternal presence of all within the ALL provides comfort and a sense of connection to everyone and everything.

And with this sense of eternal connection we can both live and die peacefully, grounded in serenity and acceptance.

Can you see, Beloved, how life is meant to be experienced? Instead of resisting the cycles of life we are meant to flow with them. Held safely in the arms of LOVE we can say “YES” to life in all its expressions.

When you open to this experience in community with other women, someone is there for you during the times when the sense of connection is stretched very thin. Within the sacred container of our shared presence we know we are not alone, and we can receive comfort in that.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here is link to listen to Micheal Bolton singing “In the Arms of Love”:

 

Are You An Invisible Woman?

Many Awakening Women are trapped in a behavior pattern which is guaranteed to generate a life that is joyless and filled with stress. This pattern is so insidious that most women are completely unaware of how it is subtly generating an experience of life that is deeply unfulfilling.

I have named this pattern The Invisible Woman. See if this set of behaviors describes you:

What feelings and needs?
What feelings and needs?
  • You have a vague sense of dissatisfaction in all your relationships.
  • You have trouble identifying your feelings and needs. (If you said, “What feelings and needs?” then this is you for sure!)
  • Typically, you don’t consider or make time for your own needs. When you do identify a feeling or need, you suppress it and tell yourself, “My needs don’t matter” or “Their needs matter more.” or “I can handle this better than other people, so I will take it on.”
  • You focus your attention on the needs of others, making sure the people around you have their needs met. Often you know what they need almost before they do. This encourages an unhealthy dependency in others. For our children it models a way of relating that perpetuates the invisibility syndrome in the next generation.
  • You say “yes” when people ask you to do something without checking to see if you actually want to do it, and can make the time to do it without some other commitment suffering, and most particularly, will your time for self-care be diminished if you take whatever it is on.

I know this set of behaviors only too well, because I once suffered from invisible woman syndrome myself. My job in my family of origin was to make my father happy. In fact, in our home that was everyone’s job. If my dad was unhappy we were all unhappy. I thought that was normal. In fact, it was so normal to me that I didn’t give it any thought. As an adult I became a caretaker. I took care of everyone whether they liked it or not!

I suspect most of us have, because our culture actually promotes this syndrome through movies, television shows and books as the appropriate way of being a woman. Likely, you saw this pattern modeled in your home when you were an impressionable child. At times, women who have had the audacity to make their feelings and needs known have suffered severe repercussions. So it is no wonder that most of us have adopted this way of being.

Who Am I?
Who Am I?

When we focus all of our attention on others, we lose the sense of who we are. Unconsciously feeling this emptiness, we give more and more, trying to get the nurturing we give so generously to others returned to us. We end up feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, confused and resentful as to why when we give so much we receive so little.

It’s not surprising, then, that this pattern can bring on feelings of martyrdom and a deep sense of resentment toward those we love. We may turn to using guilt to force our loved ones to meet our needs. These conflicting feelings of love, resentment and guilt destroy the fabric of our relationships and leave us feeling isolated and unfulfilled.

Yet we can’t expect others to meet our needs if we don’t tell them what they are. Because the invisible woman projects an image to others of being completely capable and self-sufficient, your loved ones may be unaware of your needs.  Unwilling to feel the guilt you may consciously or unconsciously try to bestow, others may distance themselves from you, moving the intimacy you longs for even further out of reach. In the most extreme examples, you may end up with deep feelings of isolation, depression and meaninglessness.

The good news is that we can teach ourselves a new way of being. We can learn new skills that will allow us to nurture and care for ourselves. We can use our awareness and keen sensitivity to recognize our feelings and needs and to make new choices.

 What can you do if you have discovered you are operating in the Invisible Woman pattern? Read the following list of guidelines for being a healthy, happy adult woman. Watch your reaction to each item and notice any objections that come up as you read. This will allow you to see how your own sense of invisibility is structured. As you become aware of how you formed this pattern you can begin to dismantle it.

A healthy, happy adult woman:

  • Spends time daily in self-reflection so she is aware of her feelings and needs.
  • Spends time daily connecting to her spiritual source and receiving spiritual sustenance.
  • Knows that meeting her own needs is not selfish. The more we meet our own needs, the better we will be able to truly support others.
  • Respects both herself and the abilities of others to look after themselves. This includes our children, in age-appropriate ways. (There are many great books and Internet resources on child development if you need more information.)
  • Develops the willingness and the skill to ask in a direct and gracious way for support from others when she needs it. This allows others the pleasure of giving to her.
  • Keeps her ‘to do’ list reasonable and manageable by prioritizing urgent and important matters and allowing the rest to be done as time allows. She knows that making time for self-reflection and self-nurturing is an urgent and important item.
  • Revises her definition of “perfection” so that her expectations of self and others are reasonable and joy-filled.

When we attend to self care, clear communication and a willingness to receive as well as give, we are powerful role models for others.

Use this list to begin to observe yourself living your life. Notice that when you follow these guidelines, life is much more enjoyable and fulfilling. Notice that when you fall back into old patterns the results are often unwanted. Make a commitment to experiencing your authentic self, and sharing that self with others. It will transform your life in powerful ways, and support you to walk your destiny path as nothing else can.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

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Kristin van Tilburg is a guide for those who are interested in exploring the power of heart-centered living. Kristin believes that everyone benefits from making the shift from surviving, which is head-centered living, to thriving in heart-centered living. Making this shift is all about experiencing who you are as a co-creative partner with life and shedding the limited thinking that keeps you bound up in survival. She guides people into heart-based knowing, and letting go of head-based fears and doubts which are the only barriers to a life of joy and purpose.

 

 

 

 

Can You Open to the Light That Is You?

Beloved One: I wish to speak to you today upon this topic of self-love and belonging. Your heavy heart inspires us to speak to you of the great communion of light of which you are a part, an eternal part, and from which you can never separate yourself. Breathe and relax! Open to the light of your true being. Leave effort and struggle behind.

You are a beacon of light. Your light illuminates the path for many....
You are a beacon of light. Your light illuminates the path for many….

In serving the greater good you are called into your own light which is radiant enough to shine brightly as a beacon to many. Do not interpret this potential in any way other than through the strength and beauty of your own love which is there and here to bless many, many more than you have imagined. Allow this to unfold and do not allow your mind to step in, but follow the energy and all is well.

Your open loving heart has moved you into the potential for great service and while this means a certain parting of the ways of the past and embracing a new trajectory going forward, there is no loss. Your light is of a certain vibratory rate that beckons to a segment and you must allow yourself to move forward in that beckoning. They are waiting for you Beloved and you have needed this time of preparation to be ready to answer their call.

Your Inner Light Will Illuminate the Path of Your Desires
Your Inner Light Will Illuminate Your Desires

The allowing of your full creative force to shine has required deep inner reconstruction of your physical vehicle and this has come at a certain price. But the days of density and darkness are over for you now, Beloved, and as you claim your focus and place it squarely in the light it will illumine the path of your desires and allow you to embrace and express this potential which has awaited this very time and this very space for full blooming.

The wisdom you have gained in recent times will serve you well as you navigate the path of service and have no fear of failure. Yes learning will occur but as I have often said, this is part of the game and becomes a joy when held in the certainty that all is well eternally and nothing here is lost or wasted effort.

Your Fire Is Beginning to Burn Brightly
Your Fire Is Beginning to Burn Brightly

As your fire consumes energy and requires more stoking to burn brightly there is much to anticipate in your full flourishing and becoming the fullest version of you. Do not be afraid to allow your desires to illumine the path and move forward with confidence that all is well and all is given and allow yourself to receive from the fullness of truth and beauty. Cast any fears that arise into the fire and allow the flame to transmute the lower frequencies.

Those who have truly loved and truly given can never be destroyed and your contribution, your work, your love, your service speaks of the eternal presence and illuminates the path for the sisters on the journey behind you. I am grateful for all you do, all you give of yourself, and wish you great joy today.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

The Magic of Your Light…

Hello Beloved One! You are a creature of the light. Your joyful response to sunlight is a clue to your true nature.

Connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world...
Connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world…

You are light, Beloved.

You are the light and you bring this knowing into your form. It is for your body to turn toward and embrace the light now, and you will see, it will.

The deep inner connection to Source has been reawakened in the body and the body will know the love that is its true nature. You will see this transition and feel it more and more as time passes. You must keep showering love and affection on this body for indeed it is a loyal and faithful servant.

rainbow bridge
Your Body is a Bridge of Light…

In its energetic form your body is a bridge of light between the higher frequency expressions of the spiritual and the lower frequency expressions of the material. In you, the two come together. As you allow the higher frequencies to penetrate your thoughts and feelings, and become fully embodied, your sense of luminosity as a physical being will become more real to you.

Embrace the future and use your imagination to create a marvelous and exciting adventure. Focus on your dreams and visions and allow them to manifest before your eyes. Allow the fear, anxiety, doubt to fall away and embrace the reality of the other dimensions, allowing them to be born here. This is why you and so many have come.

Just let it all go...
Just let it all go…

Have no worries about the release. You are doing the work and the memories of pain will fade as you embody the light. Step into the joy and allow its presence, for it is here and available to you. You have carried the heaviness and darkness long enough. It is the time for release and you will find it no burden to let go.

Most of us don’t realize how much we are holding on to past pain and trauma. As much as we think we have let go, often the old attachments to past pain creep back in and require a new release. Don’t resist this process!

It is so easy to be frustrated and tell yourself “I thought I was done with that forever.” Don’t struggle against what is in your field. Welcome all aspects of your experience…even the “re-runs.” If you see something arise that is no longer part of who you want to be, just let it go.

All of my clients, without exception, experience this letting go process. Together we discover the magic of your light, and slowly, you learn to access the magic of you on your own. The identities formed by the lower frequencies of your life experience need only to be welcomed, accepted, and allowed to be, without attachment. In this detached state, thoughts and feelings are free to come, and equally free to go, flowing on the river of your life, but not becoming stuck there.

The Magic of Your Light Outshines the Darkness
The Magic of Your Light Outshines the Darkness

The magic of your light outshines any and all darkness. It is very much like when we close our eyes. The light is never gone…we have simply closed our eyes to it. As you begin to trust the magic of who you truly are, you learn to trust the presence of the light and see from its illuminated perspective. The options you see from this expanded sense of self will provide avenues for expansion, growth and evolution. What has it been like for you to discover the magic of who you are? Please leave and comment and let me know. I look forward to hearing from you.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist

3 Effective Ways to End the Split Between Heaven and Earth For Yourself

Many Awakening Women feel a deep alliance with this phrase “Heaven on Earth.” We have a knowing within that there is way for humankind to experience this. The shift in paradigms from surviving to thriving is an indication that the time has come for heaven and earth to be reunited in the minds and hearts of humanity.

To many, the idea of heaven on earth is an impossibility, and they certainly have plenty of evidence to prove their case. There is tremendous disruption and upheaval in our world. Time itself has seemed to speed up and the level of chaos that we each must confront can be overwhelming.

But the truth is that the experience of heaven on earth can only be birthed through the heart: my heart, your heart, each individual heart. One open heart at a time the beauty of heaven can begin to radiate through you into the world. And this process began long ago. It is only now reaching a point where those of us who are called to awaken can consciously choose this experience.

What can you do to birth heaven on earth for yourself?

Are you trying to figure life out?
Are you trying to figure life out?

The first thing is to learn how to consciously open your heart, and then live with an open heart most of the time. This is not difficult, but it takes practice. We have all been trained to live in our heads. We unconsciously feel that we have to figure life out in order to survive, and therefore, we spend a lot of time analyzing, strategizing, looking for evidence, gathering facts. This was how our parents lived, and they modeled this to us. Our habitual response to challenges is “I have to figure this out. I have to make this work.” We ignore the signals our hearts try to send us, and do the “right” thing, which typically is something we “figured out” on our own.

To birth heaven on earth within we must retrain ourselves to shift to the heart for guidance and inspiration. It is only through this heart-centered focus that the possibilities and potentialities of the situation are revealed to us. From this higher perspective intuitive guidance comes and we are directed to inspired action. In this space, miracles happen, and challenges lead to breakthroughs.

Most of my clients struggle with this shift. It feels life-threatening to give up trying to figure life out, and make things happen. One of my clients is a very successful entrepreneur who was running her business through the old survival paradigm and it was killing her. She had all the trappings of success, but no joy. After learning to shift into her heart and live from this new place within, her joy has expanded, she loves her life, and she is making more money than ever before.

The second thing is to begin to view everything that happens in your life from the perspective that life is organizing itself around your success, and to trust that what happens to you is meant for good, even if the circumstances themselves are circumstances that we would judge as bad.

When you trust life, you can find the gold at the end of the rainbow
When you trust life, you can find the gold at the end of the rainbow

How many times have you, or someone you know, endured a mishap or even a tragedy, only to find somewhere down the road, that your life has come into a new level of success and happiness? It is the people who are willing to stand in the conviction that life is benevolent, to stand in trust that things are working out even in the midst of misfortune, that find the gold at the end of the rainbow.

Another of my clients experienced a major challenge when over $750,000 was stolen out of her business by her business partner. It seemed that all was lost. She could not figure out how to “fix” the situation. Her exhausted mind finally gave in. She had to surrender.

As she let go of analyzing and strategizing and opened to see the situation from her heart a new perspective emerged. New opportunities for collaboration opened up and instead of dissolving, her business expanded to a new level. Now she is actually grateful for the betrayal by her business partner. By stealing her money, that partner actually led to her receive a whole new vision of herself and her business.

The third thing is to focus on connecting to the essence of your true self. So many of us have unconsciously developed identities based on experiences and circumstances that were beyond our control, especially difficulties we experienced a children. These identities prevent you from seeing all the possibilities that life is offering to you on a daily  basis, and instead cause you to expect less.

As your focus narrows into the experiences of lack and frustration and difficulties it is only natural that your field of vision is limited. You tend to resonate with misfortune and problems, and it should then be no surprise that is what tends to show up in your life.

Connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world...
Connect to your inner light and shine more brightly in the world…

When you connect to your essence, your inner light, and establish your identity based on that light, the highest perspectives of that light illumine the possibilities you see before you. While before limitation and lack dominated your experience, with the inner light showing you the way, new possibilities and opportunities appear as if by magic.

I have a client I worked with pro bono that I took on because her life story was so tragic. She was abused by her her stepfather physically and emotionally. The ravages of that experience had prevented her from finding success in the world as an adult. She felt victimized, and this victim identity led her to experiences which always resulted in even more victimization.

As we worked together to connect her to the truth of her being she began to see herself as a survivor rather than a victim. Inside this new identity she began to connect to her strength and the empathy for others that her experience gave her. From this place she saw how much she had to offer others, and this led to a wonderful job at a women’s shelter. Her wisdom and kindness was so clear, and within a short time she was managing the shelter, and earning more than she had ever earned in any previous job. It was connecting to her own inner light that made this possible, and she continues to this day, opening to even higher expressions of her authentic self.

These kinds of inner transformations are the very processes that enable each of us to open to experience heaven on earth. You do this inner work not just for yourself, although this is important, but as you transform your life your inner work transforms the collective consciousness we are all connected to. In the same way that past suffragettes cleared the path so that today all women in the US have the privilege of voting, so your work in consciousness will make the experience of heaven on earth more easily accessed by those women who come behind you.

What ways have you found to experience heaven on earth within your life experience? Please share below, and allow your truth to expand and widen the pathway for other awakening women. I am anxious to hear from you!

Awakening Women’s Community is a sacred container for women to find mutual support and partnership as we all learn to deepen our connection to that inner light, as well as allow ourselves to relax into a new identity as that light.

If you recognize your journey in these words consider joining our free Awakening Women’s Community. When you join our free community you will receive a free checklist called 5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation so that you can begin assess your co-creative abilities.

Click Here to Join Our Free Community and Receive Your Checklist

5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist
5 Keys to Conscious Co-Creation Checklist